Peach!

Greetings once again from the Czech Republic. Just a quick blog today. Been a very busy time here with the grandson having tests in hospital but looking good so far. Three days ago I was wearing shorts and a tee shirt basking in 24 degree heat and warm nights. Now it’s cold. Minus 1 last night and winter is knocking on the door. The lesson next time is to take thicker clothing and a coat, not a few shirts, one pair of jeans and a jacket that lets in every icy blast. The locals walk about in thick coats and scarves while I shiver in a shirt that’s too thin, even in summer. What an idiot…a cold bone numbing one at that. My wife keeps saying buy a coat but I’m not doing that. I’m British! Stiff upper lip and all that. Mind you I was frozen stiff last night so I might have to weaken.

I did, however learn a very valuable lesson the other day in the fruit shop. My wife said quite loudly,” Do you want a peach?” So I turned and said,”No thanks I don’t fancy one. I’ve gone off peaches.” A few people turned and looked at us both, one woman tutting and shaking her eastern european head. “You sure?” I was gazing at the size of the cabbage. Man alive it was the size of a grizzly bears head. ” No peach for me thanks.” I’ve always found that hard bit in the middle is a bugger to swallow. “Mam!” My daughter whispered . “You can’t say that…” Looking embarrassed. “What?…Peach?” More shaking of heads and a few unintelligible words spoken. “Why? What’s up with peach?” What is it that can be so offensive about a fruit? Well it turns out it sounds identical to a swearword in Czech…the one beginning with C…..it’s a wonder we didn’t get thrown out and banished forever. This language barrier is definitely a bit of a problem. When I say Dobre Den (good morning) I’m saying it wrong apparently. Its like I’m saying, ” GoodddMOorrnning!” No wonder I get a few funny looks. This Czech lingo is doing my head in. I spit every time I say goodbye. “Naskledano!” and the people around me wipe their faces. I’ll keep my mask on next time to save them a drenching.

And not just the language. I still struggle to understand that they drive on the wrong side of the road (ours is the correct side obviously!) Nearly been taken out by a couple of irate cyclists and a bus driver. One of the cyclists shouted out at me as he swerved by, his knees going ten to the dozen. “PEACH!!!!!!” Thanks for that pal….

28 thoughts on “Peach!

  1. Hilarious story Vinny and well told. 👍
    Reminds me of the first time I met my future mum in law. I told her that I was chuffed about something and could tell from the silence that I’d said something wrong. When we were on our own the missus gave me a bollocking because where she comes from, ‘chuffed’ means being sexually satisfied. We had a good laugh about it after though! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. 😂 your experience of culture shock is palpable! The ‘peach’ word sounds a bit like its Serbo-croat equivalent ‘pička’ (‘scuse my French) except that there, they use it as a greeting 🤣🤣🤣

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hysterical! We all have some sort of story like that. When I reconnected with my cousin in Sicily via Google Translate after a long absence, I told him one of my sons is a librarian and the other is a camera man/teleprompter. ‘Teleprompter’ was translated into ‘gobbo’ which means ‘hunchback’. I get the literal translation now but back then I imagined my cousin thinking my son was a hideous creature like Quasimodo who we kept hidden in the basement and occasionally threw scraps of food! Careful what you say, Peaches! You could end up with a fat lip! Very glad to hear your grandson is doing better. Blessings! 🌟 🍑 PS – This will give everyone a good laugh; think I’ll re-post on Write Here if OK with you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah the language is impossible! We are leaving here at weekend so I’m not buying a coat when I have a couple at home. I’ll have a collection! That’s how Imelda Marcos started with her shoes….

      Liked by 1 person

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