Me and the Pope.

We left the Czech Republic a couple of days ago. My grandson is still in hospital there but tests have been good so fingers crossed he’ll be out soon. When we landed at Manchester Airport I kissed the tarmac ala Pope John Paul the second. I don’t know how he did it so many times to be honest. All you get is petrol on your lips and bits of old rubber. Good job I don’t smoke because I’d go up like a Roman candle. A Roman Catholic candle at that. It was very strange being in an enclosed space with so many passengers in a flying tin can. Its not like you can get out and have a stroll outside is it? Or open a window. I considered holding my breath for two hours but thought that was a bit extreme but my wife helped by covering my mouth till I turned blue and screamed. So in the end I decided to wear four masks and a Balaklava back to front. Did get a bit hot though but worked well even when I fainted…

And straight back to England where most people have ditched their masks and replaced them with blinkers. Personally I don’t think they work as well as a mask but quite a lot of the population believe they do. Passengers taking off masks being greeted by masklass friends. Crazy. I don’t know if it’s just here in the UK or other countries are as completely insane as ours. Mind you we have Boris and his merry band in charge so I’m sure we’ll be fine in their safe hands.

Finally driving back through Hull it’s great to see the chavs. Oh I’ve missed them. Hanging about on street corners looking shady or riding stolen bikes slowly in front of you in the middle of the road. It’s still a joy to behold. As we passed them I made the sign of the cross and said, “May God bless you my son.” Well that’s what I meant to say but it came out different. “Shift out the way you daft pricks!” To which one of them turned his spotty face my way. ” Piss off! Dickhead!”. Ah…. it’s good to be home…..

22 thoughts on “Me and the Pope.

  1. Your sure it’s good to be home? 😂 There’s no place like home, right? People don’t wear masks here unless they are in a store or in close quarters with others. Welcome home, Vinny!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Chavs are…..well google it because it’s easier! Young people with nothing to do but cause trouble and think they rule the world and can get away with anything.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. 😂 this sounds very much like my home. Loved the description of kissing the tarmac. Sometimes I feel like that until I realise after a while it’s the same shit, different country 🤣

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Pretty much the same here re masks. Was at a farmer’s market the other day and only a handful of people wore masks; I was one of them. People were partying like it was 1999. Some gave me dirty looks like I don’t trust anyone; well, I don’t. No offense intended but I prefer remaining masked when in contact with someone I don’t know from Adam. Yeah, I’ve been vaccinated; even got the booster. Doesn’t matter; not using protection (interpret that as you will) is a dangerous game. But I’m not really worried. After all, we’ve got the scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz leading our great country so what could possibly go wrong? You’re a braver man than I, getting in an airplane, but seeing your boy and knowing he’s on the mend is important. Beats FaceTime with a very big stick. I wouldn’t be kissing the pavement if I were you, though – unless you’re masked. In that case, have at it. Glad to hear the little man is getting better. Beware the chavs; they walk among us – literally.


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