Black suit and tinsel.

Well I don't know where to begin. Our Christmas has been truly horrible. My sister in law was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumour last year. She had an operation, then chemo, more chemo, everything to buy her a bit more time. But she took a turn for the worse over Christmas and now is …

Nothing on the Christmas (WordPress) menu…

My WordPress menu skills still haven't improved. They're a bit like Boris Johnson. Bloody useless! Giving up for now as it's making me want to strangle someone, which isn't good at any time of the year, especially Christmas. Anyway can I wish you all a merry little Christmas, whatever that may be. May your chestnuts …

Elf

My dearest Elf....... Please Elf on the shelf You're so full of impish fun But if I see you one more time I'll dig out my tommy gun Go back from where you came That factory faraway in China That little creepy face of yours Is giving me angina And if I see you near …

Denial.

Omicron is coming, let's have one last party! It won't bother me, I'm fit, hale and hearty! What?! Wear a mask?!! No let's have a drink, Let's paint the town red, I'm in the pink! I have my rights, I'm sick of this limbo, Covid can do one, it's Xmas! It's Crimbo! It's only a …

Who, What, Where?

What if Diago married Donna? Or Billy went on Holiday? Did George C Scott? Is Bill Withers? Would Ludvig beet Hoven? Is Gene Wilder? And is Taylor Swift? Would Chevy chase? What if Julius Caesar? Will Sam Neill? Brian May... Natalie Wood....

On the ropes…

It's the last round...the world is on the ropes being battered by big industry... It's hanging on grimly...about to fall to it's knees...down and out... So where do we go from here? Phase down coal but not phase out? Mind you I was trying to cut out biscuits but now I'm phasing them down. One …

Once upon a time..

I'm writing a book. It's a thrilling thriller. When I say I'm writing it's just the first page so far, well the title anyway. It's called GOLDILOCKS. THE REVENGE. The story goes like this... After the porridge incident Goldie becomes a delinquent, in and out of junvinile courts and blames those bears dressed as humans …

HO HO HO?

Oh God Christmas adverts are on...all these happy families in happy houses smiling at each other in festive jumpers. The new John Lewis advert is out ( so does anybody actually shop in John Lewis?!) and it's just plain weird, involving an alien and a kid. I wish the silver faced invader would zap the …

Clever people…

Clever people get right on my nerves, nine letters on Countdown, all consonants and verbs, Mastermind baffles my spec of a brain, specialist subjects, drive me insane, University challenge, who needs all that knowledge? same winners each year, Oxford, Kings College, I turn it all off cos it makes me feel thick as a plank, …

SHADOWS

The candle flickers and dances with flowing grace. Is that the wind that shakes the panes? My eyes close and I see your pallid face. Bright, now dark, blood, flowing in silent veins. The cold hand that used to touch with longing desire. And my very soul a'shivers. An eternal flame not quenched by deaths …

Peach!

Greetings once again from the Czech Republic. Just a quick blog today. Been a very busy time here with the grandson having tests in hospital but looking good so far. Three days ago I was wearing shorts and a tee shirt basking in 24 degree heat and warm nights. Now it's cold. Minus 1 last …

Passport.

MY PASSPORT IS BRAND NEW, BUT I LOOK ALL OUT OF KILTER THAT SHADOW ACROSS MY NOSE, GIVES ME A TASH LIKE ADOLF HITLER IS THAT MY FACE? BLANK AS PAPER, NO SMILE OR LAUGHING EYES? SHOULD BE IN A SHOP WINDOW, A MANNEQUIN IN DISGUISE HOW DID THEY LET ME OUT OF THE COUNTRY? …

Add Title

Start writing... Sometimes that is easier to do than you think, for me anyway, the page is blank. Then my mind starts to wonder...who invented cheese? Who first decided that a horse should wear a shoe? Why do we say, " Luck of the Irish " when they haven't had any? Just famine, death and …

Road trip.

Going on a little road trip in these covid times is a bit of a strange thing to do but off we go. The reason we are going is my daughter lives in the Czech Republic. She had my grandson in the UK but he was quite ill so they stayed for six months. The …

Award!!

I've won an award! The Honourable Order of Best Blog owners! The last time I actually won something was in the amusement arcade in Bridlington. One of those grabber machines. Might have been a teddy bear, or a dog...not a real one that would be cruel sticking a pooch in the glass box. So thank …

TOUGH?

Arnold Schwarzenegger, got nothing on me, I could eat The Predator for my tea, Make Chuck Norris cry and Steven Seagal weep, Leave Sly Stallone in an emotional heap, Put Tyson Fury on the floor, Freddy Krueger would be no more, Finally put Michael Myers in his grave, Russell Crowe would be my slave, Bruce …

Year

Well can you believe it. I've been blogging a year! I only intended to do a couple if I'm honest but found it a bit addictive. Before I knew it I was up and away. Anyway thanks for all the likes, comments and following my blog I really appreciate it!

Earth

I popped to Hull Minster today to see the planet earth.... Seven metres in diameter and created used NASA high definition. It's quite a size.... Its a fantastic thing to see... Our home slowly spinning...

Darkness.

Imagine being young,Imagine being female,Imagine you have a future,Imagine being terrified,Imagine men with guns,Imagine hope being stolen,Imagine being told how to live,Imagine your freedom taken away,Imagine hate wrapped in religion,Imagine losing everything,Imagine living in darkness,Imagine having no voice,Imagine begging for help,Imagine silence.

NERO FIDDLES…

Last night it showed a clip on the news about the wildfires in Turkey. The reporter filming from a beach in the big resort of Marmaris, a very popular place with the British holidaymaker. The hills were on fire. The sky red and smoke everywhere. Lots of men and women running around but even more …

Pigeon

A one legged pigeon from Sheffield, Very cool,laid back and quite chilled, He hopped and he pecked, Half can of beer he necked, Then hiccuped, swore and then keeled! I was sat outside Sheffield hospital just minding my own business when this one legged wonder appeared. His friend got even closer then both of them …

Life

Life takes us down a twisty, turny path sometimes doesn't it. Haven't felt like blogging much these last few weeks. Four months ago my first grandchild was born. A beautiful boy named after me. How can you have that much love for someone you haven't seen before? Crazy. Anyway he hasn't been very well, in …

FUN IN THE SUN!

Flying away to sand and sun, a little hanky panky, with some girl, name unknown, ouzo breathe, quite lanky, Wakey wakey! The Brits are here, the yobs are back in town, The girls aren't too far behind, how many drinks can they down? Booming sound and flashing lights, drink and pop those pills, No pail …

Weekend Plans?

What are your plans for this weekend? Anything exciting? I'm thinking of taking my private jet to the south of France and stay on my super yacht for a day or two. Or maybe go a little bit further, skim across the sea to Tuscany and visit my favourite restaurant, La Donk'e Hoof. The head …

Summer time…..

Summer is here! Get out your brollies, Soggy food in your vest and trollies, Here I am, feeling a bit like Cinderella, Going nowhere with a cold sausage and warm can of Stella, Wait! Wait! I see the Sun! Better dry out that burger bun, It's getting hotter! Oh Fantastic! Time to have fun, be …

One night love.

Jim sucked in his stumHe wanted some funLet the story beginHer name was BrendaThose hips were slenderBut opportunites round here were thinHe gave her the lineWhen they drank the red wine And those pub lights were dimSo Jim brought her homeTheir hands started to roam After drinking most of the ginIn the dance of lustThey …

Gangsta paradise!

The weather here is finally warming up. The sky is a beautiful clear blue and the days have lengthened. People walking around with untanned, pale legs and burnt red faces. Summer is waiting in the wings. On the down side it also means the neighbour has his rap music on loud. Now it's not my …

NIGHT NURSE.

I've been in hospital to have a thing done called an ablation. The doctors insert thin wires up through either side of the groin into arteries that go into the heart. I'm having it done because I have scarring in my heart from previous heart attacks which has been causing arrhythmia, making the old ticker …

The Jab.

I had my second covid vaccination yesterday. Brilliant to get it done. Very quick, very easy. Smooth as clockwork. They give you some paperwork with various things on it like side effects. Today I feel like I've been kicked by a horse. Not a little Shetland pony but a gigantic Shire horse. A very angry …

MOTHER NATURE.

Mother Nature turned and said, " What have you people done?""I've been here for quite a while spinning around this big old Sun."" You came along and took me for a ride."" Killing and poisoning me, you'll be crying when I've died."" So you think you know better than me?"" Polluting my sky and throwing …

Recipe for disaster.

I'm just sat watching the telly and my lord there is some absolute rubbish on. Every channel has been taken over by endless gameshows, rolling news and worst of all, cookery programmes. Chefs are now practically superstars. All for slinging a few ingredients in a pan and charging rediculous prices which people seem happy to …

Kale v Bacon.

I'm sat here listening to the radio,( Queen. Another one bites the dust. What a tune!) taking my morning concoction of tablets for the old ticker and enjoying a tray of fruit. Definitely more than five a day. Healthy body, healthy mind I tell myself, wishing I had a bacon sandwich instead, with fried mushrooms …

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