#fruit #funny poem

The fruit of death…

Orange is the deadliest fruit, Take a bite and it will shoot, It’s deadly venom into the sky, A direct hit, straight in the eye, Pain hits, have you been stung by a bee? No it’s worse than that, blinded by vitamin C, Next time I’m sticking to a granny smith, Cos this sphere of […]

health, food, life

Kale v Bacon.

I’m sat here listening to the radio,( Queen. Another one bites the dust. What a tune!) taking my morning concoction of tablets for the old ticker and enjoying a tray of fruit. Definitely more than five a day. Healthy body, healthy mind I tell myself, wishing I had a bacon sandwich instead, with fried mushrooms […]

cowboys, poem, crime, hull

The Bransholme Cowboy.

It’s funny really but I thought poetry was just for ‘Arty Farty’ types (apologies to any Arty Farty types out there) and not a numbskull like me. How wrong I was! Turns out I’ve been really enjoying it here. So I wrote a few. I only ever intended to do a couple of small blogs….. […]

#nature #Poems trees wild.


The wind blew the tree and the tree danced back Branches creaked Murderous crows swooped and squawked Laughing from above Black sillouettes on gray pallete Dappled leaves lazily float away to pile and decay Bark, withered like old skin It’s roots twist and turn, burrow into earth and stone Standing, grown through seasons past Summers […]

technology, annoying, life

Lost in space two…the revenge of the menu.

Oh man….. technology wins yet again… Every Braincell has been used. Every dark recess of my mind has been searched and still it’s a no no. Damn this modern , fast paced, super speedy world we live in. All I want to do is change my menu and put my blogs and poems separately but […]

#funny muscle, fitness, vanity poem


Pump the iron make the Hulk look puny, Jog till you drop like a demented loony, Flexing in red shorts looking mean and moody, Plenty of Punch with a touch of Judy, Up at six addicted to sweat, Kale smoothie at eight, I wouldn’t touch that for a bet, The vainest man that I ever […]

City life poem


A barking dog and a big white van, Early morning frost and a dustbin man, Kids go to School via the bakers shop, Four sausage rolls make your heart say stop, Smoking mother’s chewing the fat, Pass a wrinkled man in an old woolly hat, Straight to the bookies, his money will diminish, Bellow at […]

Birds, art, money, true


I don’t know where you live but here in Britain the dialects, accents vary greatly from place to place. What somebody says in one part of the country might not make any sense in another part. Here in Hull we have quite a few different words for things. A back alley is called a ten […]