I had a battle with a wasp this morning. It was that big I was like a lion tamer with a chair and a whip. It must have been some sort of mutated freak of nature. Big as an american football, a stinger that would kill a giraffe and fangs as sharp as needles!
I walked into the bedroom and heard a buzz. Not a little buzz, more of a chainsaw sound, high pitched, aggressive. The damn thing flew straight at me and I automatically jumped. Well when I say jumped I ended up on top of the wardrobe, cowering. The killer wasp turned and for a second we were eye to eye, fear gripped me as it launched itself again. Terrified, I dived and rolled off the bed like a stunt double and quickly grabbed a cup and unopened letter. It suddenly decided to land on the window and I that was my moment, the one and only chance. My legs sprang up and I expertly tried to cup the beast. It made a noise that chilled me to the bone, like a buzzy scream of rage. It was that strong it made the mug jump! Luckily I then had the opportunity to put the letter underneath, trapping the flying horror. Somehow I managed to get it to the open window and let it escape. It flew off but incredibly turned to come back in. I was like lightening, slamming the window shut. It angrily banged it’s ugly head against the glass then disappeared, probably looking for a new victim.
Alright, I may have over exaggerated a tiny bit…… It wasn’t as big as that but it did scare the crap out of me!