Categories
#Christmas

Nothing on the Christmas (WordPress) menu…

My WordPress menu skills still haven’t improved. They’re a bit like Boris Johnson. Bloody useless! Giving up for now as it’s making me want to strangle someone, which isn’t good at any time of the year, especially Christmas. Anyway can I wish you all a merry little Christmas, whatever that may be. May your chestnuts […]

Categories
Christmas,poetry. elf on the shelf funny

Elf

My dearest Elf……. Please Elf on the shelf You’re so full of impish fun But if I see you one more time I’ll dig out my tommy gun Go back from where you came That factory faraway in China That little creepy face of yours Is giving me angina And if I see you near […]

Categories
Christmas, family, adverts, drunk

HO HO HO?

Oh God Christmas adverts are on…all these happy families in happy houses smiling at each other in festive jumpers. The new John Lewis advert is out ( so does anybody actually shop in John Lewis?!) and it’s just plain weird, involving an alien and a kid. I wish the silver faced invader would zap the […]

Categories
Christmas, Flowers

Happy Christmas!

The beautiful poinsettia…. Apparently it goes way back to the Aztec times. Now of course it’s the plant associated with this time of year…. So Happy Christmas to one and all….

Categories
Christmas,poetry.

Past Christmas.

I’ve never wrote a poem in my life but here goes….a little Christmas ode…. Oh Christmas time….. Not enough money in our pockets, Too many plugs to fit in sockets, A good excuse to drink all day, A drunken Santa on his sleigh. Eat a full pork pie and a selection box, Slumped in a […]