We took our little nieces to see Father Christmas yesterday. Both girls under six so the magic of Christmas was overflowing. Excited faces and smiles. It was breakfast with Santa which is essentially an overpriced full English with some old bloke sat in a corner, sweating under a large red suit with a huge fake […]
The Unhappy Elf.
You see a lot of them, this time of year. Faces that should be shining with glad tidings and joy but look more like a slapped arse. Their cup of Christmas cheer is leaking and definitely down to the dregs. Those morose shop assistants having to wear a ridiculous hat whatever the circumstances…. Had a […]
My WordPress menu skills still haven’t improved. They’re a bit like Boris Johnson. Bloody useless! Giving up for now as it’s making me want to strangle someone, which isn’t good at any time of the year, especially Christmas. Anyway can I wish you all a merry little Christmas, whatever that may be. May your chestnuts […]
My dearest Elf……. Please Elf on the shelf You’re so full of impish fun But if I see you one more time I’ll dig out my tommy gun Go back from where you came That factory faraway in China That little creepy face of yours Is giving me angina And if I see you near […]
HO HO HO?
Oh God Christmas adverts are on…all these happy families in happy houses smiling at each other in festive jumpers. The new John Lewis advert is out ( so does anybody actually shop in John Lewis?!) and it’s just plain weird, involving an alien and a kid. I wish the silver faced invader would zap the […]
The beautiful poinsettia…. Apparently it goes way back to the Aztec times. Now of course it’s the plant associated with this time of year…. So Happy Christmas to one and all….
I’ve never wrote a poem in my life but here goes….a little Christmas ode…. Oh Christmas time….. Not enough money in our pockets, Too many plugs to fit in sockets, A good excuse to drink all day, A drunken Santa on his sleigh. Eat a full pork pie and a selection box, Slumped in a […]